Theory #4

Too many people are using problems in their relationships as an excuse to give up. Since when was it ever okay to get a divorce because the two of you couldn’t work out a financial problem, sexual frustrations, or time spent together? If there’s anything that I don’t believe in this world it would be divorce. Maybe that’s why I’m so hesitant to settle down and get married; not because I’m young, but because there are so many people out there who aren’t willing to forgive, compromise, and stick it out, but they’d rather take the easy way out and just break up, or file for a divorce.

The way I see it, whenever you’re involved with anyone there will always be someone else who is smarter, hotter, more beautiful, or have more in common with you than the person you are currently with, but does that mean you should give up what you’ve dedicated your time and energy to risk it all with Mr./Ms. Potential? This new intriguing person shouldn’t be who you’re thinking ‘what if’s’ with, the person you’re with should be the person you should be seeing as Mr. /Ms Potential.

This is from the movie ‘Why Did I Get Married’ from Tyler Perry. He has made some ridiculous movies but I suggest most if not all of you to watch this movie. But in the movie there’s a rule called the 80/20 rule which is in every relationship you will only get 80% of what you need and want from the person you are with, and there will always be someone else out there who is willing to give you the other 20%. Since you’ve been missing the 20% for so long, you are excited and risk the 80% for the 20%. Only to find out that the 20% isn’t as fulfilling as the 80%, but by the time you’ve realized that the 80% is long gone (hence me bringing up the one that got away in past posts).

Look, every relationship there will be stages. The puppy love, new excitement, butterflies in your stomach won’t last the whole time two people are together. And it seems like a lot of people out there take it as once that stage is gone, that the love is gone also and call it quits. To me a relationship will always start off in heaven, and then lead down to hell with all of the trust, loyalty, commitment problems but once two people work through all of those, you’ll be back in heaven. If two people can’t compromise and work through their problems when they’re in the hell stage, then maybe they should part ways, but I believe that there isn’t anything that two people can’t work though as long as both people are committed and dedicated enough to work though the problems. Keyword: both people.

And that's why I refuse to believe in divorce or breaking up (I tend to stay in a relationship for as long as I can to stick it out, but there's only so much I can do when I'm the only one putting effort into it). Just pick someone to marry who is as willing as you are to make things work and the word should never cross your mind.