If there was one thing I learned in 2010, it would be to never judge anyone. I’ve been trying my hardest to not judge anyone for whom they are or for the things they have or are doing. Things I’ve learned and why I try not to judge anyone:
1) We’re all individuals. We all have our own hearts, minds, and eyes. We all might experience similar things in life but we all do not feel the same, think the same, or see things the same as everyone else.
2) People make their decisions and choices on what they feel are best for them and their happiness. I can’t judge someone for the things they do or have done without knowing the reason behind it.
3) I have lost months, maybe even years of a potential great friendship(s) because I judged someone(s) before getting to know them on a more in depth level. But better late than never, I dropped my barriers for that person, and to my surprise we’re great friends (or so I think we are hehe). Goes to show that you truly can’t judge someone off from what they’re letting you perceive of them. Give everyone a chance because everyone has something to offer in your life. Even if they break your trust, deceive you, and do you wrong, you still learned something right?
4) I’ve always believed that you perceive only what the person wants you to perceive so there’s always more than what meets the eye. I let others see me as this girl whose crazy, drinks a lot, parties a lot, never likes to stay home, etc…but my close friends can vouch otherwise. So I can’t judge someone off what they put on for the world to see, like #3 I’d probably be surprised if I got to know some of the people I’ve brushed off.
5) Like, #3 and #4 I’ve “wasted” a lot of my time on friendships I thought were great because I judged them to be better people than they actually were. That doesn’t mean I’m going to necessarily cut them out of my life (see reason #7 on why), but I know to not spend so much of my time and efforts on them.
6) There are some things that are out of the person(s)’s control. Do you think they wanted pimples and acne on their face and/or body? Do you think they wanted to wear glasses? Do you think they wanted a big nose? Do you think they wanted curly or straight hair? Do you think they wanted their teeth to be crooked? –Yeah exactly, so shut up.
7) Ever since summers end and even ‘til now I consistently still get comments here and there on how much I have changed as a person. Obviously these changes weren’t overnight, but gradually the person I am today is different in many ways from the person I was six or seven months ago. Not everything has changed of course, and some can argue against this but a lot of my close friends have said it’s been for the better. And that’s why I don’t judge a book (person) by the cover because most of our books (life) are still being written, as so is mine.
8) It is absolutely disgusting when I see people judge people I love and care for. I wouldn’t want to bring that feeling upon someone else, especially when I don’t know them.
9) So you’ve heard this and that about them, but like the game of telephone we all played in grade school, by the time you heard what you heard how much of it is true? And even if it was true it all goes back to reason #2.
10) 99% of the time you only know their name, not their story. We’ve all gone through things to make us who we are. Who are we to judge a person and say that the way they are dressed, how they are feeling or what they’re doing is wrong or right? We don't know the trials and tribulations or the good fortunes that have brought them to be the way they are, like most people don't know the things we have been through to make us who we are either.
Just a good tune for the ears on a sunday evening: