Thursday, June 28, 2018

Roller.Coaster.

As much as I love you baby girl, carrying you has been mentally exhausting at times.

I started my weekly ultrasound and OB appointments at 32 weeks, I'm currently 34 weeks and will be 35 on Sunday. 32 weeks I was given the beautiful news that baby girl passed her breathing test 8/8! But of course the good news was also accompanied by some "bad" news: baby girl was (currently still is) in a breech position.

My OB was out that day, so I scheduled my appt with her colleague which was fine because there was a 99% chance that she wouldn't be the one to deliver baby girl, so, it was nice getting to meet another OB who may. Anyways, her colleague went over my options as and discussed rates of success and risks for each.

At the end of the day, danny and I decided that if baby girl was still breech by 36 weeks, a planned c section was the option we'd go with.

I have weekly appointments scheduled up until my 39th week and I keep going back and forth between the two delivery methods.

Things I've been googling recently:
C section vs vaginal births
Breech baby
Breech baby ECV
What to expect c section
Breech baby Health

Etc, etc. I like going down the rabbit hole you see.

Last week when I left my appointment, I thought of birth complications that could take me away from Danny, baby girl, and this world. I know baby girl would be in good hands bc Danny without a doubt will be an amazing father, but I couldn't help but feel...let's just say I bawled my eyes out driving home from my appointment. And I'm bawling now.

The emotions I've felt during this pregnancy...the nonstop rollercoaster of emotions, some days I'm not so sure if I could put myself through this again. But to give baby girl a sibling and Danny a second child I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Praying for a healthy baby.
Praying that I'll continue to be healthy post delivery.
I know our family has a few guardian angels watching over us.

Sent from my iPhone

No comments: